Writing C1.1 (sample)
Here is a writing our student, Laura Guerrero, did in relation to the chaotic situation of tourism in Spain. The mark of this written task is 65.
Dear friends from International Tourism magazine, > Dear readers,
In response to your request for opinion articles > essays, I would like to write these letters > lines about the chaotic situation of tourism in Spain.
(This is not a blog post, this is an opinion essay.)
Spain, the unknown paradise?
It is well known that our country is one of the first places in the list of the most visited countries in the world (?) > , but -and this is the drama- it occupies one of the last positions in spending per visitor > in tourism investment. Spain has not been able to sell itself > be promoted as a quality tourist destination.
There are exceptions, of course, such as prominent cities like Madrid, Barcelona or Seville, but empty Spain, with its rich heritage and excellent gastronomy, is ignored by tourist circuits that focus on the sun and beach > sun-and- beach tourism. Furthermore, the prosperity of the coastal regions where tourism actually arrives > is a reality (also “…coastal regions which are reached by tourism) does not reach the whole population either. It has been shown that high housing prices and precarious employment make the quality of life in these areas worse for the local population than in other areas where there is no tourism.
To make a long story short, if the Spanish tourist sector wants to leave behind the siesta+paella topics > the clichés of paella and siesta, it is mandatory to launch a series of initiatives to make this possible[: first > . First of all, (?) > it is necessary to structure a transport system that puts the interior cities on the map. Secondly, (?) > it is crucial to develop policies aimed at favoring small and medium-sized enterprises in the tourism sector and last but not least, launching > it would be convenient to launch advertising campaigns to attract quality tourism.] This is how the «Spain Brand» will be stronger than ever. [: first of all, to structure….] > (Cohesion here fails. Cohesion here is typical of an oral speech rather than a written speech)
Task of fulfillment: 5
Cohesion and coherence: 10
Grammar: 25
Vocabulary: 25
Comentarios recientes